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16 September A Part of Something BiggerToday was the "day of caring" which means that you can select a volunteer organization to spend time with during the work day. Some folks at work suggested signing up to do some trail maintenance at a local park. MAN it was hard work. 2 hours of solid hoeing and/or shoveling. I told the gal I was working with that if I did this every other day, I'd have rock hard abs and super toned arms. Forget going to the gym! As I got into the rhythm of the work, my mind started to wander. I imagined myself on a farm in the 1800s having to hoe stubborn dirt into something useable - so that I could plant a garden and live. Either that or I was working on a chain gang doing time. I don't think I"ll look at a hiking trail quite the same. Lots of work goes into keeping those places up! The parks people wanted to record the event. I somehow got handed the camera for that task. The folks I worked with were a little loony, like me. We took some serious photos, but also had some fun. I mean c'mon, shovels, hoes, buckets of dirt, rocks and a whole forest to ourselves?! I'm sure the supervisor is going to have a few laughs when he looks at the photos we took. It will be interesting to see if any of the fun ones make it to their site. If so, I'll have to post them here.
Another cool thing was that we got to plant some trees. I picked a nice healthy pine sapling and carried it to the site. Once there, I looked up into the sky to make sure there was a wide space for it to grow up into. I was then struck with the thought - after packing in the dirt around it - that I helped give a new life to something that would most surely outlast me. It was humbling. However, it was in that spot because of me. in my own little way, I'd left my mark. At that moment I felt a part of something bigger. 13 September An Unexpected DiscoveryThe other day I went to a Mariner's game. I expected that they would lose, but to my surprise - they won. They haven't been doing so well this year. The atmosphere was nice, because you could feel the excitement in the stadium and the air cracked and roared with the applause of thousands of fans. Where was I? In the Terrace Club - drinking a beer with my girlfriend and finishing an overpriced hot dog. I played softball for 11 years, and so I do like the sport. Nevertheless - the game served as a backdrop to an engaging conversation between my friend and I. It is very easy for me to become distracted during the game with talks of relationships, fashionable shoes, work etc. I may have been a tomboy - but still I'd rather gab with a girlfriend then watch the game (8/10 times at least!). =) Much to the relief of my mother, I grew into things like fashion, make-up and girlie things. I honestly think my mom was afraid of my tomboyishness. I hated dresses and wanted to play with the boys in the neighborhood and played soccer at recess. Okay, the boys and soccer haven't changed...but I do love shopping and have a weakness for fashion. =) However, for a mother who supported herself by modeling part time- I wasn't exacly the little girl in the pink fluffy dress and black paten leather shoes playing with dolls she always wanted. (At least that is what I imagined..) She got the little girl who was loud, ran everywhere, played with blocks, match box cars, thought make up was rediculous and got dirty. However, I did have a passion for Cabbage Patch Kids, the American Girls dolls and Strawberry Shortcake. All was not lost.
But I digress!
After the game and dropping my friend off at her apartment on Queen Anne Hill - I stopped at a light by Easy Street Records. Ah, self-indulgence. I wanted music. I decided to pull in and blow a few Jacksons on the musical arts.
I walked away with two discs - the Posies and a new discovery - Tim Seely's Funeral Music.
"Everyone" knows the Posies. However, Tim Seely - perhaps not.
I was drawn to the packaging. I always am (same goes for wine labels - although my boss cringes at that). The case resembled a folder and had a string clasp on the back (the kind you twist around circular paper disks). Very creative. The cover, had a pink music staff, two measures and the "lyrics" - "Caw, Caw". There was a chickadee-esque bird upsidown. Artistic. Irresistible. I made the purchase - good music. Emotive, sometimes mellow. Check it out: http://www.armyoftim.com/
In fact, while looking for a link to Tim - I ran across a great blogger. Definitely worth a read. Funny coincidence, she recommended the album AND noted the interesting packaging: http://nictate.blogspot.com/2005/08/spin-globally-think-frequently.html#comments. I just read this entry but it hooked me. =) Love the observation and commentary about the Audrey movie. Not to mention anyone who bothers to transcribe an old movie and make a comment like that HAS to be cool. Rock on Nictate. 12 September You Might Already Be There... This is a forward I got from a friend. I think I could definately take a lesson from this. I might not be trying to build my own company - but I am guilty of working too hard at times. =)
A boat docked in a tiny Mexican village. An American tourist complimented the Mexican fisherman on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took him to catch them.
17 August Mid 40's are the New Late 20's?How does time get away from you? It feels like in between trying to get through the pile of dirty laundry in my room and meeting work deadlines another month has just evaporated into thin air. My mom always says things like "Enjoy your youth because it goes by SO quickly!". This is usually followed by some sort of reflective look in my moms eyes of "days gone by" and then I start to feel my mortality. This sudden flash of my mortality rushing to my consciousness that I then subdue has been somewhat recent (read - the past 2-3 years). It now starts to sink in just-a-bit. Mom has always said this, but as a seventeen year old - it was more like - gee...I still have to pay more for a rent-a-car and I can't wait to get to college. Mortality was associated with Halloween and the Grim Reaper posters I'd see around. (Hmm...yes, me in my happy middle-class-America bubble.) Now, it sets in just a bit. Granted, I'm still in my twenties, but nevertheless - I've got TMJ (I can't open my jaw without it popping), I threw my neck out twice in the past two weeks by doing heroic things like looking up from resting my head in my hand and stretching while in that space between sleeping and waking? My favorite? The way I eat DOES effect my day. Remember when you could live on coffee and cereal? Or for some - Coke and candy bars? Maybe I'm focusing on this because I worked out last night, must not have hydrated enough and now I've got a little headache. Man! That would NEVER have happened in college! Heehee. I have now reached the official stage in life where I actually have to take care of myself. (Imagine that!) No more later nights during week days, no more "getting by" on cold cereal for dinner. Ah life was so much easier! Sure - I could be “irresponsible” - but I do feel its effects at work the next day.
How did the rollercoaster of time speed up so much? When I was in grade school - summer vacation was an eon. Now - just when they're setting out lawn chairs at Target it seems like the next day it is a back-to-school sale. Or - you blink and it is mid-August.
I was thinking about mortality and my "late youth" on my drive home yesterday. I started thinking things like "wow" am I living the stuff I'm going to reflect on with such longing as my mother does? So - THIS is IT. This is where I'll drift back to when I'm 65 and reading a book on the porch? Interesting.
I was never the one to subscribe to "these are the best years of your life" in high school. Folks were sad to leave. I wanted nothing more than to get out and move on to college. I was NOT missing those high school years. I couldn't wait for them to be finished. So maybe late twenties is the new "high school" - for those of you who just LOVED those teenage years.
Let me pose the question: To bloggers of all ages - when you think of the "best times" are they in memory? Are you looking forward to them? Perhaps your forties are the "new" late twenties? I'd be interested to know.
Well - what happened in that "blink" before it was August? Well, I did note that I've gone thru a lot of changes earlier. That included buying a new car. Well, I finally sold the other one (attached pic) and I've almost unpacked and organized everything in my "new-ish" condo. I'm still trying to find the "sofa of my dreams" and I had a MAJOR deliverable at the end of the month. 5 soccer games, 1 Mariners game, 1 trip to Portland and I've ALMOST beat Jade Empire on the Xbox....
BLINK!.....Is it September? 01 July Adventures in KauaiAs some of you have already seen...I've recently been to Kauai. An ABSOULTELY gorgeous island. However, I do think the pictures speak for themselves. (Insert 24k words here). My boyfriend asked me to be his date for his friend's wedding on the island - so we got a chance to share in a very special moment. The wedding day couldn't have been more perfect. It was in the evening and the weather was just right (not too hot) with a gorgeus blue sky dotted with white puffy couds. The pounding of the surf could be heard in the background as vows were exchanged. It was a short wedding followed by a savory dinner at a very nice esablishment.
When we weren't doing something "wedding related" we were driving around the island checking out the breathtaking beaches and natural beauty Kauai has to offer. You may wonder why I have pictures of chickens and how on earth I got accosted by them (chickens/car photo)? (Thank goodness I had a peace offering of crumbled animal crackers!) Chickens run wild on Kauai. They are everywhere. So much so that we turned the old "Yellow Slug Bug" and hit someones arm (when you see a VW beetle) game into saying "buk bawk!" and hitting the other's arm. It was quite entertaining as we drove around the island to get to various sites of natural beauty. You may think...well that is kind of silly to make up a game for some chickens. Let me tell you...it became a novelty just HOW many times you'd see chickens on your drive. In a fifteen minute drive (depending on where you were) you could see anywhere from 2-8+ chickens. The story is that there was a tornado and some cages were knocked open and the freed chickens just started multiplying because there were really no real preditors. My boyfriend was rather entertained by the massive amount of chickens. I ended up getting him a kitschy shot glass that says Kauai with some cartoon chickens on it. See...even the locals are capitalizing on the chicken phenomenon....
Another comment about Kauai? Well...as you can see...the beaches are amazing. The interesting thing is that there is so much beach and most people go to Maui or Oahu that I think there are just less tourists. Anyway...many times it seemed as though we had our own private beach. If you are someone who wants to higher end shop and spa...Kauai isn't the place to be. But if you want a taste of true island life and an outdoorsey experience...Kauai is your island! Aloha! 14 June Corporate SkydivingI hate skydiving - in the real world. However, I love Corporate Skydiving. What is that, you may ask? My definition of Corporate Skydiving is taking a risky project. Something visible and something people have high expectations of. That is precisely what one of my projects is at the moment. It is a risk to put together something like this...but I'd much rather take the risk than do something that is routine, under the radar and somewhat predictable. Yeah, I'm a sucker for the challenge. I love the thrill of it and the minds that I get to interact with. So since the event is this week, last minute preparation is happening. I'm currently in the free fall stage...emotions are high...butterflies in the stomach...we're crossing our fingers that this 8 months of prep will have paid off. At this moment all seems well...good presenter, good topic, great co-workers helping out…everything. I'm getting ready to pull the rip cord and anticipate a nice float back to earth. But now...the thrill of the free fall and trusting that my parachute I've spent months meticulously stitching together will hold my weight. Wheeeeeee! Yeah, I'm a Corporate America adrenaline junkie.... Shameless. HA! And you thought working in the shiny halls of corporate america wasn't an "extreme sport". Well...it is. ;-) You couldn't pay me to try skydiving in real life though. I'm not willing to risk myself physically but I AM willing to take what could be termed as "risks" in my career and also emotionally. Interesting. Perhaps because of my philosophy of "nothing ventured, noting gained". I'd be curious to know what other Skydivers are out there? Emotional Skydiving, Corporate Skydinving or hell...just Skydiving.
07 June Thought Provoking SpaceI just decided to randomly click on a site and got the one below. The Blogger took the time to think of topics and pull quotes from well known authors on that theme. I love intellectual quotes and so I think its a great site for a thought provoking read. Plus, he refrenced Emerson. I love Emerson. :0) Blogging and Rush Hour Traffic: They are Almost the SameMy world is huge. My little universe, really isn't so little. In my mind. But in all actuality...it is miniscule. I tend to think this way as I sit looking out the window during take off. Perspective jumps out at me in a matter of seconds...minutes...then I'm a spec on a grid. I've lived in Seattle all my life. The Sound has been the backdrop to my little universe (with the exception of 4 yrs in college in Spokane...). Er...I mean huge universe. Sometimes when I'm sitting in traffic or driving on the freeway I get the same feeling of perspective. Except that every car represents a different "universe" - and a very "big" one at that. Chock full of different beliefs, values and hang ups. Sometimes I wish I could just tap into that universe for a minute to see what it is like there. I'm sure some of it would scare me...some of it would be very interesting. I don't mean just know whether or not that person likes catsup on his hash browns...I'm talking about the worldview. Similar to what I have from my own little car. Something more intimate..."Perspective". Perspective is very intimate...really...it has everything to do with how you filter your little universe. Or..how the universe around you is perceived and what you make of it. On greater thought though...to not be completely overwhelmed I wouldn't want to know all the intimate details. Just enough so that I could understand what the top three issues/big deals are in the person's life...whether they are happy, sad or what their views are. Similar to....can you guess? BLOGGING! Now, I will agree...some blogging isn't personal...but some really is. But you can't just write stuff and do it for a prolonged period of time without being able to understand more about the author of the Blog. So, when I'm on the freeway...and I see all the cars zooming by me...those are all little universes. Just imagine being able to freeze time, and go up and chat with some of them. (If you touch the car...it doesn't drive off..but magically the person inside comes to life and "voila!") In addition...imagine that the license plate is the Blog "handle" if you will. In daily life we wouldn't DARE be so personal with every day strangers. I know I wouldn't hang out at Red Robin with a sign on my car that said "new idea if you care to chat about it..." Know what I mean? Seems kind of strange to be able to approach a perfect stranger in a car and just ask them a few things...or know some very intimate pieces about them. Things they just might NOT tell you at a party if you meet them for the first time. But I guess the other piece is that you can be entirely anonymous. I'm choosing to post my picture. But that also means I won't feel comfortable putting stuff in here that would be for my journal only. I.E. what I'm REALLY thinking about me, my life and more complex states of my emotional condition. I suppose if I called myself "fuzzy bunny" and just decided to dump to the world and hope that I could just get some comment from the great "void" and post no tracable data...that could work. But again...that is just too public for me. I'd know my deep dark secrets were on cyberspace for all to see. but I do think some people find comfort in that. They can be brutally honest - whether that is with themselves or they need to just get something off their chest. In that vein...I think I'd be surprised if I knew how many people really lived double lives. I'm not that way. What you see is what you get...when it comes to me. Straightforward. So...you could do one of two things. Get out your "time and space pausing" mechanism...that makes people friendly and chatty....or you can just go to the updated Blog spaces. You can enter little universes...that you see driving by in cars every day...which really are huge universes...to the beholder.
03 June The Cusp of ChangeThis has always been a fascinating concept for me - "The Cusp of Change". We never know when we're on it. Sometimes life can seem so routine, so dull. Like nothing exciting ever happens. Just another hamster in another wheel. (Not to say that I believe my life is dull...it most certainly is not..). It is just that it is easy to think that one's life will never change. You wake up, shower, brush teeth, put on your clothes and head out the door to meet the commute. You flick on the light switch in your office, boot into Outlook and sip your coffee to see what exciting news Corporate America has sent your way. Little do you know...in exactly TWO days something will dramatically impact your life. You see, it could be something simple...that person you've known forever...you could have a falling out. A small thing could set something off that has been slowly building up for months.You could meet your next significant other. Maybe he just happened to pick up his coffee at Starbucks and walked out seconds before you walked in. Don't worry...you'll meet him in 2 days because he lost his keys that morning on his way out the door. That was the magic ingredient that tipped the scales of time for you two to meet. What do you think it would be like if you knew when you were on the cusp of change? We're not talking about playing the odds in the sense that, "wow, my life has been crappy lately...a streak of bad luck...it has GOT to turn up soon". But that you just knew. I wouldn't want to know...as curious as I am about the whole gosh darn thing. That said, I have had hunches...and most of them have been right when I recognize it. I have an odd and compelling tug of curiosity..but really knowing would take the mystery out of life. You'd know those thrilling highs and lethargic lows. The magnet on my fridge says, "Some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what is going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity...."-Gilda Radner. I was quite pleased that I found a magnet that defined my interest in the concept of the Cusp of Change. You never know when your there. It reminds me that life is exciting. We have a false sense of permanence. Life is always changing and conversely, that will change you. Think for a moment...where were you, who were you exactly one year ago? How different are you? And really...in the back corners of your heart and mind..not just the obvious things. I know I am supremely different. The Cusp of Change. You never know when your there. You know when you've completed a season of change...sometimes it is incremental and you wake up and think " Wow..." as you brush your teeth in the bathroom looking at yourself in the mirror, "I'm different. I really am." Or maybe it is more obvious...something big has happened. Like buying a new car, moving to a new place or starting a new relationship. The Cusp of Change - Right before it happens. Without it...life would loose its dynamic - as welcome or unwelcome as that change may be. People should welcome change...I know I do (sometimes reluctantly...sometimes with open arms). It is what keeps life interesting, intriguing, entertaining and challenging.
12 May Anyone There?What I wonder is...anyone there? Who on earth would read the blog of a stranger sitting up at 1:20AM. I just finished writing a referral for a freind of mine. I hope she gets the job. If they don't hire her...they're crazy! Hmm..Coldplay is playing from my iPod. I work for a company that competes with iPod. Oh the irony. Heh. After I have my late, late night snack of a spoonful of peanut butter it is time to go to sleep! Ah, peanut butter. The stapel food of my childhood. I think it is a comfort food for me. You can never go wrong with peanut butter. Now, did any of you read this? If so, I may be compelled to write more. Perhaps something interesting and more thought provoking. Fellow Bloggers...we shall see!
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